We accept the love we think we deserve

The title of this post comes from one of my favorite books and movies (that I also starred in), The Perks of Being a Wallflower. I knew I loved it, but I never really thought about what it really means.

It means we settle.

We know things need to change, or something is not right but we are such creatures of habit-so afraid to embrace anything different- we stray away from the word 'new.'

We all do it. I'm guilty of it more than I want to be. We run scared from what's new even if it means we are running from something we love or someone we love. Opening-up can be down-right terrifying.

Why do we do this?

Why do we punish ourselves? Everyone always says 'life is too short' but do we actually practice what we preach?

As I creep closer to graduation-change is eminent in the future. It's one of those down-right terrifying situations too. College has brought me every thing that makes me truly happy and now its ending. I've started to realize that-to quote my favorite band-it's time to begin. Stop messing around and embrace change. Embrace fate. But never accept anything unless you DO deserve it.

I should be ashamed of myself

June. Really? That's the last time I posted to this blog. I should be ashamed of myself.

In that last post, I wrote I wouldn't be publishing any masterpieces in order to enjoy my summer. If you bought that excuse for laziness, I guess I can consider it a job well done.

To be completely honest, I have been a busy girl. I guess I'll let my excuses for not writing help fill you in on what has been happening in my life the past few months. From holding an internship (I now have a new one, which I'll touch on later), to starting my LAST year of college, becoming a proud aunt to a beautiful baby girl, taking on the role of a president of a campus organization, and writing my senior honor's thesis (on crisis management in college sports in case any of you were wondering), my free time has been pretty sparse.

I know, I know.

We all think we are busier than everyone else in the world, but this has personally been my busiest school semester.

Now that I am on winter break (whooo!), I felt it appropriate to resurrect my blogging hobby. After a crazy fall semester, winter break seems like the best present this girl could ask for. I have been able to catch-up on movies I have been wanting to watch (Moneyball, The Descendants just to name a few), read books that have been on my "must read" list since the summer ("Gone Girl,"...I highly recommend this one), and basically sleeping and laying around. A much needed mental break before homework, thesis writing, and Bayer (my new internship), take over my life.

So it's taken me from June to write another blog, but I guess the spirit of the new year being just around the corner inspired me to bring back my hobby (as cheesy as it sounds). Unlike most New Year's resolutions, I promise to keep writing in this blog to keep some sanity when the insanity starts back for the Spring 2013 semester.

An Empire State of Mind

I haven't written a blog in quite some time, which I personally think is a good thing. I have been incredibly busy these past couple weeks, but now that I have some spare time, I figured I should chat on what has been happening in my life.

First, I have to mention the highlight of my summer, my trip to New York City. I have already been to the big apple with family, but getting to share the NYC experience with my two best friends is something I will never forget. From taking a harbor cruise at sunset past the statue of liberty, to looking out at the skyline from the top of Rockefeller center, to dinner in little Italy and seeing the amazing lion king on broadway, and finally strolling the Brooklyn Bridge and Central Park, New York was everything I could have hoped for. It's rare I get sappy (since I can occasionally be a robot) but seeing all of the sights of NYC would not have meant anything at all without my two best friends by my side, so this blog is a little shout-out to Chip and Alliecat for being the two best friends a girl could ask for.

This is my last summer of freedom before entering adulthood. I'm trying to
make the most of every minute of it. Although I'm still working like a boss(Rick Ross voice), I'm taking full advantage of warm summer nights and good times with friends and family.

So there is just a glimpse of what I have been up to lately. I suggest you do the same as me and slack off and enjoy the beauty of sweet summertime.

And in that moment, I swear we were infinite

On Sunday night, the premier of one of the highlights of last summer was shown on the MTV movie awards, the perks of being a wallflower trailer.

For any of you who haven't seen it, WATCH IT. If your from Pittsburgh and don't get a slight case of the chills from the last shot of the trailer, you should probably check your pulse.

Perks is an homage to our city. The author and now director of the film, Stephan Chbosky, is from our great city and stages his critically acclaimed and uplifting coming of age story all around our home.

I was fortunate enough last summer (as many of you probably heard me say a thousand times) to be an extra in the film adaptation of perks. Even though I was only an extra for one day (about 13 hours straight to be exact) it was one of the best experiences of my life. I was one of the many extras attending the football scene in the film where Charlie, played by Logan Lerman meets Sam, played by Emma Watson. First from the standpoint of being a Harry Potter fan my entire life, sitting directly in front of Emma Watson was an experience in itself, even though I was too star struck to speak to her. The other young cast members of perks, including Ezra Miller as Patrick and Vampire Diaries's Nina Dobrev, as Candace were also on set that day and are just a fraction of the awesome cast for the film.

Decked out in early 90s attire and celebrating the same touchdown for about ten hours never got old because I was surrounded by friends who have all caught the film industry bug. The atmosphere was electric. I think all of the extras felt as lucky as I did to even just be a part of perks.

So mark your calendars for September 14, 2012 to experience The Perks of Being a Wallflower. And look for a girl in a beautiful all denim outfit with a red flannel shirt.

Even if I don't make it into the final cut of the film, I loved every second of perks. I loved making my acting debut, and being a small part of a book and now film that has meant so much to so many people. I guess I should say, for those 13 hours, I understood slightly what feeling infinite means.

From Columbus, with love.

As I write this post, I am sitting in my hotel room in Columbus resting before exploring the town with my fellow intern. This trip marks many firsts.

My first business trip, my first time in the capital of our neighbor state, my first time going to business lunches and dinners.

I have only been at Ryerson for almost a month, but I have already checked off many 'big girl' business firsts. This internship has turned into much more than a summer job, it's giving me experience for the future.

For any of you who haven't heard me talk about it, Ryerson is a metal company. Yes, I'm selling metal while working at the beautiful Ambridge industrial park. And no, I'm not wearing a hard hat and a welder's helmet, although I like to tell everyone that I am and Flashdance was a loose interpretation of my life.

To get back on subject, this is my first time traveling without friends and family by my side. And since I love cliches and cheesy sayings, I'm going to say absence makes the heart grow fonder, there's no place like home, home is whenever I'm with you, etc..

Being without having the option to visit my family and friends is a strange thing to get over.

Yesterday, another girl at the office said something that I usually say to one of my friends, and a little homesick pain hit my heart. Only after one day being away.

What can I say but, I belong in Pittsburgh with my family and friends.

So this post is from Columbus with love, and a quick return to Pittsburgh.

Love your baby girl

This post is dedicated to all the mommas out there on the day that celebrates the one woman who is always by our side.

I personally would like to thank my own mom for everything she has done for me. From laying in bed for three months straight just to bring me into this world to staying up with me at night when pet cemetery scared the hell out of me as a child, to checking my 25 page papers, to attending every event i have been in, no matter how big or small, and so much more, you have always been there for me mom. I am the young woman I am today because of you. Even though I'm an almost college grad (who has her own business cards now), I am still and always will be your little girl. Even though it's not enough, all I can possibly say is thank you.

Now for the other most important woman in my life, my grandmas.

For my grandma Norma that's in heaven, I miss not seeing you on day's like today. But I still know your always with me and watching me grow.

To my grandma, Alba. In every picture I have as a toddler before I could walk, you are holding me up to stand on my feet. From that age until now, you were always helping me to stand strong. Your always there to support me (and feed me) and I can't ever say how much you mean to me.

To my readers, tell the mommas in your life how much they mean to you. I think we can all agree they deserve it.

FREEDOM

Finally. Finally. is all I have to say.

School is finally over. Grades are posted. Stressing over papers and projects is nothing but a distant memory.

Every summer, I try to set some goals I want to accomplish. Read certain books, watch certain movies, visit new places. This weekend, I started off my summer doing some I those things I always want to do, but being perfectly honest, never get the chance to do.

First. On Friday, I kicked off the summer with purchasing a ukulele. Yes. A tiny ukulele. It is a beautiful instrument and I am teaching myself to play for the summer along with a kind friend who decided to take the challenge with me.

Second. I have recently become...I guess you could say obsessed... with the series LOST. I never watched it while it was on television, but I have started from the beginning (with the same friend who has accepted the ukulele challenge) and it is fantastic. I highly recommend the series or starting to watch a series that is no longer on television from the beginning. Avoiding the week to week anticipation makes watching tv so much more enjoyable. (In case anyone was wondering, I have five more episodes to finish the first season)

Third. I planned a trip to NYC. I went last summer with my family and I loved every second of it. So much so, I decided to plan a trip with my friends this summer (Broadway show included- The Lion King). So watch out NYC, we are coming for you in June and you will most likely never be the same.


For a first weekend off from school, I couldn't have asked for a better kick off to glorious summer break.

Happy summer readers. Have fun, and try not to be boring, it seems to be frowned upon.